Truth detector

[mmcirvin]

Sen. James Inhofe (R-Pyongyang¹), who is six inches tall² and rode to the Candy Planet on a giant blue doggy³, notes that the presence of many, many footnotes^4,5,6 is the surest sign of incontrovertible truth⁷. All humanity is indebted to Sen. Inhofe and his unique insight⁸ for revealing this fact^9,10 to the rest of us¹¹.

¹Richard Condon, The Manchurian Candidate, Four Walls Eight Windows reprint edition, 2003.
²Jonathan Swift, Gulliver's Travels, Everyman's Library edition, 1991, pp. 78-83.
³Matt Groening, Childhood is Hell, Pantheon, 1988.
⁴Gene Ray, Cubic, http://www.timecube.com/, retrieved Feb. 11, 2005.
⁵Ann Coulter, How to See Your Liberals Driven Before You And Hear The Lamentations Of Their Hairy-Legged Women, Rabid Hellhound Press, 2003, p. 16.
⁶Revelation 17:3-8
⁷Matthew J. McIrvin, "The Fibonacci Ruler", Am. J. Phys. 61:1 (1993), pp. 36-39.
⁸Mark Twain, Rutabaga Phillips, Jackson & Sons, 1898.
⁹Webster's defines "fact" as "fact (n). a thing I just made up out of my own head just now." Since the beginning of time Man has taken facts as the truest form of truthfulness. May facts continue to bless us with their factuality.
¹⁰Deepak Chopra, The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire: Harnessing the Infinite Power of Coincidence, 1st ed., Harmony, 2003, p. 98.
¹¹The author is indebted to the late Emperor Norton of the United States of America for his invaluable assistance in preparing this manuscript.

Comments

[ammenemes3.livejournal.com]

The "hyperabundance" of "footnotes" in a document is not "nearly" as "effective" as a heavy "reliance" on "quotations" in conveying "penetrating" insights about "commonly" held "misconceptions."

[sunburn.livejournal.com]

That is as "opposed" to the "over-use" of "quote-marks" in order to "acquit" oneself of any "responsibility" for the "use" of "loaded" words.